Sunday, March 1, 2009

Why does my dog do these weird things?

I have a beautiful pure bred Yellow Lab. Buddy comes from a long line of field/hunting Grand Champions, has all the markings and measurements to conform to breed standard and is a beautiful specimen. And then there is his reality. He is crazy, hates to be outside, hates the pool, and has a long list of weird fetishes.

I have to be thankful that he has never ruined any furniture, shoes or toys in our house. He is a great dog 90% of the time. It's the other 10% that drives us crazy.

He counter surfs so no food can be left anywhere when we go out or even leave the room. He has eaten loafs of bread, with the plastic, raw meat, avocados, oranges, bananas,tomatoes(an entire basket full), cheese, plates of food, bagels, sandwiches in one gulp, and butter.

All the taboo foods that supposedly could kill a dog? Yeah he has eaten them. Last year he jumped up high enough to pull down my oldest daughter's Easter basket off her chest of drawers and ate all her candy. There had to be 2 pounds of chocolate in there, he never even burped.

He has eaten an onion, about 15 packs of sugar free gum(stolen out of visitors purses), and grapes which are supposed to be bad for them too.

His strangest delicacy is paper. He is addicted to eating napkins, paper towels, t.p., and tissues. He hunts through the garbage to get every last tissue so he can feast on it.

Another tasty treat is Rabbit poop. We have hordes of bunnies in our backyard and Buddy loves to chase them. But, he also loves to snack on their droppings which is so gross I can't begin to talk about it. (Let's just be thankful he isn't a big kisser!)

Other than his constant watch dog barking at anything that may move out the window, the fact that he gets locked in my studio and cries to be set free about 10 times a day, his jumping on visitors, his steel tail and 90 pound body knocking over visitors, his habit of sleeping on the sofa when we aren't home and licking his feet so there are wet stains all over it, his asking to be let out but then not going out due to the weather, and his anxiety over people being in the pool that causes him to bark incessantly and pace, he is a great dog! Really. He is.

5 comments:

Splendid Things said...

Ahh....man's best friend! You must be a patient person! :) I bet he is precious and super sweet! Thanks for sharing!
Jeanette

Audrey said...

I don't think anyone understands dogs - okay, maybe the dog whisperer. We have a spanish ranch mastiff, really nice, but has a mind of her own. Will stick with Bouvier's next time again.

rabbitwhiskers said...

That's so funny!! I have several funny posts on my dog, too! At least they're a great source for post material!! I love dogs and enjoy reading about them~ this was great!

SleightGirl said...

Awww...My dog likes eating toilet paper right off the roll.

Kyfarmlife said...

I have a Chocolate lab...2 years old next month...he hated water until he was a year old...eats anything loose in the yard..absolutly LOVES horse and cow poop! uuuuuggggghhh! He too would make a fine hunting dog....but he'd rather eat the birds than bring them to you like he can do so well with his ball! I did almost loose him to parvo at 6 months old....man was I scared...he gets spoiled to say the least..with raising beef cattle he gets all the left over steaks...doggie heaven!